I am taking a minute to catch my breath. I've spent the weekend at the hospital with my Dad, who's quite sick. My 19 year old son just packed up his school books and left for the hospital to be with his Grandpa so I can get some laundry done and get some rest. I'm giving myself permission to not think too much. Instead, I'm going to recommend everyone take a few minutes to call someone you never have time to call, hug someone who's around so much you may take their presence for granted and maybe take a minute to send a good book to someone you love just to let them know you were thinking of them. I'm going to go call a few people myself.............
And look at what this guy does with books. WOW!!!
http://centripetalnotion.com/2007/09/13/13:26:26/
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Fear Disguised as Zen?
I was talking with a friend of mine this week and she was complaining about her husband's lack of urgency about anything. She said, "He talks about things he wants to do, but he's so Zen he never seems to feel any hurry to get there." Hmmmm.......
I am also very "Zen" and since she said this to me it has been rattling around in my head. I am often described as "laid back", "easy going" and "chill". From the outside, most people would see this as being worry-free and a bit fearless. In many ways I am, through years of studying Buddhism, meditating and reading books that further my understanding of letting go and acceptance. I stay more present than a lot of people I know. There's not much to worry about in this moment. But still, I thought about what my friend had said. Something about it was bothering me. Hmmmm........ and then, it hit me.
I knew her husband. I knew about his plans, ideas, hopes and dreams. He talked about them a lot, with enthusiasm. But somehow, when it came time to making a commitment towards making them happen, to taking a step toward them, he just never did. I also realized, it had nothing to do with being "Zen"; it was good old fashioned fear disguised as calm. What had made this resonate with me is that I realized I have also learned to not feel my fear of stepping off; I just avoid it by being "contemplative", sometimes endlessly, about things that might involve risk. I have been confusing my inaction when I'm fearful as just being willing to be happy where I am.
Wow. This feels important to me. I wonder how common it is among my fellow inner peace seekers. I'm betting more common than many of us have imagined.
For myself, I've decided to be a little more willing to feel my fear. But from now on, rather than making it my enemy, I think I'll embrace it and let it spur me towards courageous action. A little nervous energy, when you think about it, can feel an awful lot like excitement. And I don't know about you, but I never want to get so Zen I forget the shivery joy of giving an unsure thing a try. Here's to feeling the fear and doing it anyway!
I am also very "Zen" and since she said this to me it has been rattling around in my head. I am often described as "laid back", "easy going" and "chill". From the outside, most people would see this as being worry-free and a bit fearless. In many ways I am, through years of studying Buddhism, meditating and reading books that further my understanding of letting go and acceptance. I stay more present than a lot of people I know. There's not much to worry about in this moment. But still, I thought about what my friend had said. Something about it was bothering me. Hmmmm........ and then, it hit me.
I knew her husband. I knew about his plans, ideas, hopes and dreams. He talked about them a lot, with enthusiasm. But somehow, when it came time to making a commitment towards making them happen, to taking a step toward them, he just never did. I also realized, it had nothing to do with being "Zen"; it was good old fashioned fear disguised as calm. What had made this resonate with me is that I realized I have also learned to not feel my fear of stepping off; I just avoid it by being "contemplative", sometimes endlessly, about things that might involve risk. I have been confusing my inaction when I'm fearful as just being willing to be happy where I am.
Wow. This feels important to me. I wonder how common it is among my fellow inner peace seekers. I'm betting more common than many of us have imagined.
For myself, I've decided to be a little more willing to feel my fear. But from now on, rather than making it my enemy, I think I'll embrace it and let it spur me towards courageous action. A little nervous energy, when you think about it, can feel an awful lot like excitement. And I don't know about you, but I never want to get so Zen I forget the shivery joy of giving an unsure thing a try. Here's to feeling the fear and doing it anyway!
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Tweak or Transformation?
My friend's comment to last week's post has had me thinking all week about the how's of making positive changes. We can find the right teacher or mentor, take up a spiritual practice or, my favorite, sit down with a good book that inspires us, but we still have to make the commitment to put into action new ways of thinking or being in the world. Her question, the same many of us ask, isn't "what should I do?" but "how can I do it?"
I think often the challenge lies in the nature of inspiration itself. True inspiration excites us, calls us to action and has a sense of urgency to it. We want the payoff now; we're ready to be transformed!! We feel elated that we have found a new way of seeing things that make sense and resonates with our soul, and we somehow expect our dynamic new insight to manifest itself in magical external rewards. And then, when we still have to pay the bills, the kids are still making us crazy, we still have moments of anger, sadness, fear or loneliness, the reality of our ordinary lives settles back on us. We feel disillusioned and wonder why we can't keep our spiritual momentum and desire to make authentic changes alive.
So, the question remains; how do we keep moving towards our best selves? How do we take the ideas that inspire us and keep our good intentions from falling away when our initial enthusiasm starts to wane? I think we may want to focus less on "transformation" and more on "tweaking".
To transform is to make a radical and profound change; not something we may feel completely confident we're capable of. It's easy to lose faith in our ability to alter ourselves and our way of living in such a big way. The people in our lives may not love the idea either; their fear of losing the "us" they've grown accustomed to can result in them being less than supportive. Personal transformation can be daunting enough in and of itself; trying to do it while those around us, consciously or not, are sabotaging our efforts, makes it more difficult still. The end result is we often give up on our new convictions and settle back into a feeling of frustration and defeat.
Tweaking, on the other hand, is quieter, less overwhelming and friendlier to those around us. Most of us feel fairly good about our chances of making small changes stick. Making a plan to spend 15 minutes checking in with ourselves in meditation is less threatening than promising ourselves we will become Buddhas over night. Committing to being conscious of where the food we eat comes from and practicing gratitude before a meal is less threatening than promising to never let meat touch your lips again and giving up sugar forever.
It's true, some people do experience almost instant enlightenment. Some seem to reinvent themselves dramatically, quickly and for good. But most of us will have to settle for changing things that matter to us, to waking up, to getting closer to our best selves, a little at a time.
So, keep tweaking. Before you know it you'll look around and realize you've not only transformed yourself, but you've transformed the world as well. One tweak at a time.
I think often the challenge lies in the nature of inspiration itself. True inspiration excites us, calls us to action and has a sense of urgency to it. We want the payoff now; we're ready to be transformed!! We feel elated that we have found a new way of seeing things that make sense and resonates with our soul, and we somehow expect our dynamic new insight to manifest itself in magical external rewards. And then, when we still have to pay the bills, the kids are still making us crazy, we still have moments of anger, sadness, fear or loneliness, the reality of our ordinary lives settles back on us. We feel disillusioned and wonder why we can't keep our spiritual momentum and desire to make authentic changes alive.
So, the question remains; how do we keep moving towards our best selves? How do we take the ideas that inspire us and keep our good intentions from falling away when our initial enthusiasm starts to wane? I think we may want to focus less on "transformation" and more on "tweaking".
To transform is to make a radical and profound change; not something we may feel completely confident we're capable of. It's easy to lose faith in our ability to alter ourselves and our way of living in such a big way. The people in our lives may not love the idea either; their fear of losing the "us" they've grown accustomed to can result in them being less than supportive. Personal transformation can be daunting enough in and of itself; trying to do it while those around us, consciously or not, are sabotaging our efforts, makes it more difficult still. The end result is we often give up on our new convictions and settle back into a feeling of frustration and defeat.
Tweaking, on the other hand, is quieter, less overwhelming and friendlier to those around us. Most of us feel fairly good about our chances of making small changes stick. Making a plan to spend 15 minutes checking in with ourselves in meditation is less threatening than promising ourselves we will become Buddhas over night. Committing to being conscious of where the food we eat comes from and practicing gratitude before a meal is less threatening than promising to never let meat touch your lips again and giving up sugar forever.
It's true, some people do experience almost instant enlightenment. Some seem to reinvent themselves dramatically, quickly and for good. But most of us will have to settle for changing things that matter to us, to waking up, to getting closer to our best selves, a little at a time.
So, keep tweaking. Before you know it you'll look around and realize you've not only transformed yourself, but you've transformed the world as well. One tweak at a time.
Saturday, February 5, 2011
The Time is Now........
Welcome to my blog. Let me begin by saying I'm a reader not a writer so please forgive my lack of grammer skills and style. The one thing I do have in abundance is an appreciation for the written word and it's power to change us, inspire us, shape our thinking and improve our lives. My hope is to share Indy publishing news, author info, marketing ideas and anything relevant to inspirational authors and the readers who love them so we can come together to change our world for the better, one writer and reader at a time.
With all the talk of 2012, I think a lot of us are feeling the pull to finally make the changes we need to make to become the person we know we want to be, deep down inside. When you are going over past journals and the same commitments to change the same things keep showing up year after year and you realize you still haven't made it happen for yourself, it might be time to start manifesting those goals and dreams, once and for all.
Easy, right? No, not exactly easy, but not without it's pleasures either. How? Well......... may I recommend a good book?
With all the talk of 2012, I think a lot of us are feeling the pull to finally make the changes we need to make to become the person we know we want to be, deep down inside. When you are going over past journals and the same commitments to change the same things keep showing up year after year and you realize you still haven't made it happen for yourself, it might be time to start manifesting those goals and dreams, once and for all.
Easy, right? No, not exactly easy, but not without it's pleasures either. How? Well......... may I recommend a good book?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)