I've been reading a book by Thich Nhat Hanh called "Friends on the Path". I'm not sure why I chose this book now. I didn't grow up with organized religion so as a child I had no notion of a "church family". Even now, although I visit temples and meditation groups, I belong to none. I have been thinking that maybe I need to have one now; I have a growing longing to belong somewhere.
Thich Nhat Hanh describes a spiritual community, a "Sangha", as a group of people who can keep you on your path. He said "If we support each other, we become much stronger, and we can more easily resist the temptation of despair." I agree. But does our community have to share a spiritual belief system, or is it enough that it just cares for us, despite our beliefs? And, if so, what does "spiritual" mean in this context?
Websters has a few definitions for "spiritual". One says it is "concerned with religious values". I don't think that works for me. I prefer this one: "of or relating to sacred matters." What is sacred is a very personal decision, but may be shared by people of very different belief systems. "Religious values" suggest to me that a common belief system must be shared before people can be considered to be in a spiritual community. At one time I may have agreed that common religious values were a necessity for a group to support it's members, but in the last month I have opened and changed my mind considerably.
I mentioned in my last blog that my Father has been sick. It has been an emotionally and physically exhausting experience. But slowly, I have also been awakened to the beauty and kindness, the decency and friendship that has been shown to me through this trial. If a spiritual community is not a group held together by common "religious" values but of shared "sacred" values, I seem to have had one I hadn't fully recognized or appreciated until now.
At night, when I would return from the hospital, my Facebook profile and inbox would be full of virtual hugs, offers to help, words of love and support and just "thinking of you" messages. When I managed to make it into work, my coworkers would come by and put a hand on my shoulder, ask if I needed anything or inquire about my Dad. I was left email messages, phone messages, and even a card from someone I have never seen, just to let me know I wasn't alone. I sat last night as I meditated and sent some love back, too tired to send messages any other way, but hopeful my love would be felt. As I thought about my "Sangha" I counted Christians and Buddhists, a few Atheists, and an Orthodox Jew. As I continued to send my thoughts of gratitude I saw a Muslim, several Agnostics and a Wiccan. Some of the people I was returning love to I realized I had no idea what "God" they did or did not pray to and it didn't matter one bit. This was my Spiritual Community. They support me, make me stronger and keep me from despair. They keep me on my path of acceptance, kindness and awareness. They are all sacred to me.
I think Buddha would be pleased.
You are an up lifter Joan, and it is not surprising that in turn you are uplifted. Great blog!
ReplyDeleteThank you Donna. :)
ReplyDeleteI have been following your blogs and FB posts since the day we first spoke on the phone through Balboa. So I understand some of the nuances you have been going through around your father's illness. So the fact you picked up Thich Nhat Hanh's "Friends on the Path," does not surprise me in the least.
ReplyDeleteWhen our immediate, structured family does not or cannot serve our needs, for what ever reason, we naturally look outside of that place to a circle of love. We, who respond to your need, are the ones who have also had heartaches in one way or another. We understand. And we feel compassion. Since we are one anyway... how could we not?
Always know we love and support you.
You have no idea how much that means to me. My heart is full. I am grateful and humbled.
ReplyDeleteWell said Joan! It's so true and have been fortunate to have several friends who have found me to keep me on my path! Including you, so thank you!
ReplyDeleteAll the best with your dad - enjoy these moments
ReplyDeleteLove it! What would we do without our spiritual communities? Everyone, everything and all beliefs are all part of the puzzle of life. What a puzzle it is. Beautiful magnificent and encompassing.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful expression Joan!
ReplyDeletegreat post Joan
ReplyDelete